MACADAMIA MARZIPAN CHOCOLATES

Yet again, my head can't really cope with definitiveness too well; and it's overwhelmed by flashes from distant places in space, plus the past and the future (although I wouldn't know for sure, I had enough self-proclaimed witchcraft and wizardry, and cooking lessons, and bruises, for a lifetime), and I don't know if our nordic escapes will soon be a distant memory too, but here's to marzipan chocolate, best enjoyed in the 9pm sun in squatted military areas where cannabis trade is a thing; and to not being alone; and welfare pack lunches and mind-blowing banana eating techniques; to design museums and art galleries but also cake giving and post card shopping; and, please, to the hopefully several more escapes to come (to Disneyland too, with lucky rabbits), and if they don't have marzipan chocolate there it's fine, I'll bring along a Bonus Pig bag full of it.

ESPRESSO MINI CAKES

No adjective can describe the past four years more accurately than 'tiring', and still it isn't over just yet; so for the couple weeks to come (and for the roads left in both of our shoes): cakey coffee muffins, and I'll sleep when I'm dead.

HAWAIIAN WEDDING CAKE

In my head there’s a station where my thoughts depart to far-away places; and they go find a sun that shines fair and bright and a light breeze, and the clearest water, and if your dusty hands washed one another you would know what it feels like to be new; and I don’t know if it’s a quiet port town, or a land of pine forests and deserts, or a thousand mountains, or familiar foothills, or yet another Hawaiian dream with eyes open wide; but they may discover a place where they belong more than here; and if it’s a sweet fruity cake that takes them there then I hope it takes me too.

RAW LEMON SWISS ROLL

Cake roll happens because of promises made to sunny people on sunny days; and because the shape of things to come is looking very swirly to say the least; but also because if swirly things (or stomach ache, or car crashes, and car-crash shaped cake) ever come your way, you've got to be ready and turn them around as best as you can; and it may take some serious multi-tasking, and you may have to improvise or momentarily hide piles and piles of stuff in your wardrobe or interrupt your Preacher episode half way through and your NutriBullet will perhaps struggle; but if you try and you're lucky enough, you may end up staring in excitement at delicious citrusy creamy things, and these delicious citrusy creamy things may well make you sunny inside a little.

BLACK SESAME BUTTER MOCHI

I don’t think anyone out there will be surprised one bit to find me day-dreaming about trips to Hawaii and Japan instead of getting my shit together and out of this place once and for all; but in my defense, I’ve created these little squishy squares that combine the very essence of Hawaiian cake and Japanese treats all in one and they’re so rich and squidgy and flavoursome and if you ever find a way to stop shovelling them into your mouth, please let me know as I’m now at risk of rolling my way back home like a giant mochi ball they’re that good.

ALMOND & PISTACHIO BISCUITS

All that hasn’t happened in four years has suddenly decided to elbow its way to me and happen in the space of a month; and there’s a long long list of people and shoes and medications, boxes, bubble wrap, Texas dreams and Spanish Squads, trains and planes and places and faces; plans and plants and plantains; but never mind breathing, there’s got to be room for baking; and even though I myself will have to stick to whisky and Star Wars breakfast cereal (separately) to avoid death from stomach ache, I know how to make good use of the packs of almonds and pistachios lying in the still-stupidly-full kitchen cupboard (and that goes without mentioning the dinosaur cookie cutters, because you can always make good use of dinosaur cookie cutters): almond and pistachio biscuits; deep breath; go.